Pentium jokes

Red Squirrel · Post by **Red Squirrel** » Mon Jul 28, 2003 8:27 pm

Q: How many Pentium designers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 1.99904274017, but that's close enough for non-technical people.

Q: What do you get when you cross a Pentium PC with a research grant?
A: A mad scientist.

Q: What's another name for the "Intel Inside" sticker they put on Pentiums?
A: The warning label.

Q: What do you call a series of FDIV instructions on a Pentium?
A: Successive approximations.

Q: Complete the following word analogy: Add is to Subtract as Multiply is to: 1) Divide 2) ROUND 3) RANDOM 4) On a Pentium, all of the above
A: Number 4.

Q: What algorithm did Intel use in the Pentium's floating point divider?
A: "Life is like a box of chocolates..." (Source: F. Gump of Intel)

Q: Why didn't Intel call the Pentium the 586?
A: Because they added 486 and 100 on the first Pentium and got 585.999983605.

Q: According to Intel, the Pentium conforms to the IEEE standards 754 and 854 for floating point arithmetic. If you fly in aircraft designed using a Pentium, what is the correct pronunciation of "IEEE"?
A: Aaaaaaaiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeee!

TOP TEN NEW INTEL SLOGANS FOR THE PENTIUM

9.9999973251 It's a FLAW, Dammit, not a Bug
8.9999163362 It's the new math
7.9999414610 Nearly 300 Correct Opcodes
6.9999831538 You Don't Need to Know What's Inside
5.9999835137 Redefining the PC -- and Mathematics As Well
4.9999999021 We Fixed It, Really
3.9998245917 Division Considered Harmful
2.9991523619 Why Do You Think They Call It *Floating* Point? 1.9999103517 We're Looking for a Few Good Flaws
0.9999999998 The Errata Inside

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Chris Vogel · Post by **Chris Vogel** » Mon Jul 28, 2003 11:04 pm

Red Squirrel wrote: Q: What's another name for the "Intel Inside" sticker they put on Pentiums?
A: The warning label.

Those were funny.

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:1142, old post ID:10126

Red Squirrel · Post by **Red Squirrel** » Tue Jul 29, 2003 11:11 am

Yeah I really like that one too.

"5.9999835137 Redefining the PC -- and Mathematics As Well"

"Q: Complete the following word analogy: Add is to Subtract as Multiply is to: 1) Divide 2) ROUND 3) RANDOM 4) On a Pentium, all of the above
A: Number 4."

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:1142, old post ID:10148