"Welcome Mr. Gates, we've been waiting for you. This will be your home for all eternity. You've been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life. Frankly releasing Windows 95 two years early, would by itself, have landed you here. But enough of that."
"You've arrived on a day when I'm in a good mood, so I'll be generous and give you a choice of three places in which you'll be locked up forever."
Satan takes Bill to a huge lake of fire in which millions of poor souls are being tormented and tortured. He then takes him to a massive coliseum where thousands of people are being chased about and devoured by starving lions. Finally, he takes Bill to a tiny room in which there is a beautiful young woman with an alluring look on her face, at a table on which there is a bottle of the finest wine. To Bill's delight, he sees a PC in the corner. Without hesitation thinking he outsmatred the devil, Bill says
"I'll take this option."
"Fine," says Satan, allowing Bill to enter the room. Satan then locks the door. As Satan turns around, he bumps into Lucifer.
"That was Bill Gates!" cried Lucifer.
"Why did you give him the best room in the house?"
"That's what everyone thinks" snickered Satan.
"The vintage bottle of wine you see - It has a hole in it. That Beautiful young lady - She doesn't"
"What about the PC?"
"Oh, If you look carefully, you'll see that it crashed!" laughed Satan.
"And it's missing three keys,"
"Which three?"
"Control, Alt and Delete."
Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:2840, old post ID:23235
And there would be no reset button on the machine, heck, no power button either, oh and no CD-ROM drive so he can't attempt to install something else. 