'TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CRISIS
'Twas the night before crisis, and all through the house,
Not a program was working, not even a browse.
The programmers were wrung out, too mindless to care,
Knowing chances of cutover hadn't a prayer.
The users were nestled, all snug in their beds,
While visions of inquiries danced in their heads.
When out in the lobby, there rose such a clatter,
I sprang from my tube, to see what was the matter.
And what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a super programmer, oblivious to fear.
More rapid than eagles, his programs they came,
And he whistled and shouted and called them by name:
On Update! On Add! On Inquiry! On Delete!
On Batch Jobs! On Closing! On Functions Complete!
His eyes were glazed over, his fingers were lean,
>From weekends and nights, in front of a screen.
A wink of his eye, and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know, I had nothing to dread.
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
Turning specs into code, then turned with a jerk.
And laying his finger on the "GO" key,
The system came up, and worked perfectly.
The updates updated, the deletions deleted;
The inquiries inquired, and the closing completed!
He tested each whistle, and tested each bell,
With nary a crash, and all had gone well.
The system was finished, the tests were concluded,
The clients last changes were even included!
And the client exclaimed with a snarl and a taunt:
"Its just what I asked for, but not what I want!" 
Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4160, old post ID:33959