blonde jokes

[Red Squirrel]

GEOGRAPHY?
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench
talking... and one blonde says to the other: "Which do you think is
farther away... Florida or the moon? "
The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you
see Florida...?????

CAR TROUBLE

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells
the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is
idling smoothly.
She says, "What's the story?"
He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
She asks, "And, how often do I have to do that?"

SPEEDING TICKET

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks
her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff,
"I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you
take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to
you!"

RIVER WALK

There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river
and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts,
"How can I get to the other side?" The second blonde looks up the
river then down the river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."

KNITTING

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on
the freeway.
Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde
behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious
to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his
window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"
"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"

BLONDE ON THE SUN

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one
day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on
the sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each other and
shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll
burn up!" said the Russian. To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"

IN A VACUUM

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was
her turn.
She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature.
Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your
name, can you hear it?"
She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired
two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde
responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named
Timex. Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs
Like that?"

"HELLOOOOOO," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs!"

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:3371, old post ID:27238