Things You Don't Want To Hear During Surgery

[Red Squirrel]

1. "Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.”
2. "Someone call the janitor - we're going to need a mop."
3. "Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness"
4. "Bo! Bo! Come back with that! Bad Dog!"
5. "Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?"
6. "Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie."
7. "Oh no! I just lost my Rolex."
8. "Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?"
9. "Damn, there go the lights again...."
10. "Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy's got two of them."
11: "wait a second, we have to amputate his left arm right?"
12: "I never saw this organ before..."
13: "Quick, get me the duct tape!"
14: "I think we're pretty much done, maybe put a bit of WD-40 here and we can close it up"
15: Can you call the morge downstairs so they can make room for another body?
16: "cool, these scisors are the same zigzagy ones we used in art class back in the day"
17: "What's this bone doing here? Pass me the saw."
18: "Wow, and I thought the inside of a computer looked complicated!"
19: "Would you look at the size of that bump?"
20: "hey cool, that's the same kind of uncurable cancer we talked about in my grade 11 biology class yesterday"
21: "Oops, can you get that heart for me, it's just beside my foot"
22: "Sweet, this patiant is user friendly, there's more space to work in"
23: "What should I use to disinfect this, Lysol or Vim?"
24: "Oops, that was not a vein"
25: "Ok, who's the bright one who hid the TV remote, the game is on right now!"
26: "All done. Hmm, maybe I should put a bit more solder here just to make sure it's a good connection."
27: "This part can wait till our next shift. My family is waiting for me to open the gifts, see you next week."
28: "It's a boy.... squirrel?"
29: "Crap, killed another one today. Oh well, we're running out of blood donors anyway, might as well put this blood back in the fridge."
30: "Don't you think we should of started once we're out of the ambulance?"

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:2006, old post ID:16532