some jokes... for a change
Posted: Tue Jan 04, 2005 3:17 pm
originally in afrikaans and translated, should still be just as good though:
No offence to blondes for the first few
Why are there 17 blondes waiting outside a bar?
You have to be 18 to get in
Why did the blonde only tie one shoelace?
It said on the shoes "Taiwan"
Why did the blonde keep empty bottles in the fridge?
For her friends which dont drink
Why do Cuban athletes never take part in rowing events?
All Cubans that can row are already in America
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day,
Teach a man to fish and he'll sit in a boat all day drinking beer
Why does it take 100,000,000 sperm cells to impregnate one egg?
Not one of them will stop and ask for flicking directions
And last one, bit longer:
Jesus is extremely worried about all the people on earth doing so many drugs. He calls an emergancy meeting with his disciples and gives them orders to go to earth and each return with a different drug so they can see what its all about, he thinks after that, he'll be able to take further action.
Two days later, Jesus is sitting in heaven, waiting for his disciples.
He hears a knock on the door.
"Who's there?"
"Paul"
Jesus opens the door
"Paul, what have you brought us?"
"Hash from Morocco."
"Well done, come in."
Another knock
"Who's there?
"Mark."
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring us, Mark?"
"Marijuana from Holland."
"Well done, come in"
Another knock
"Who is it?"
"Matthew."
Jesus opens the door.
"So Mathew, what did you bring back?"
"Opium from Afghanistan"
"Well done, come in."
Another knock
"Who is it?"
"Judas."
Jesus opens the door
"What did you bring back, Judas?"
"FBI you dimwits, hands against the wall"
Archived topic from Anythingforums, old topic ID:1606, old post ID:21234
No offence to blondes for the first few
Why are there 17 blondes waiting outside a bar?
You have to be 18 to get in
Why did the blonde only tie one shoelace?
It said on the shoes "Taiwan"
Why did the blonde keep empty bottles in the fridge?
For her friends which dont drink
Why do Cuban athletes never take part in rowing events?
All Cubans that can row are already in America
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day,
Teach a man to fish and he'll sit in a boat all day drinking beer
Why does it take 100,000,000 sperm cells to impregnate one egg?
Not one of them will stop and ask for flicking directions
And last one, bit longer:
Jesus is extremely worried about all the people on earth doing so many drugs. He calls an emergancy meeting with his disciples and gives them orders to go to earth and each return with a different drug so they can see what its all about, he thinks after that, he'll be able to take further action.
Two days later, Jesus is sitting in heaven, waiting for his disciples.
He hears a knock on the door.
"Who's there?"
"Paul"
Jesus opens the door
"Paul, what have you brought us?"
"Hash from Morocco."
"Well done, come in."
Another knock
"Who's there?
"Mark."
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring us, Mark?"
"Marijuana from Holland."
"Well done, come in"
Another knock
"Who is it?"
"Matthew."
Jesus opens the door.
"So Mathew, what did you bring back?"
"Opium from Afghanistan"
"Well done, come in."
Another knock
"Who is it?"
"Judas."
Jesus opens the door
"What did you bring back, Judas?"
"FBI you dimwits, hands against the wall"
Archived topic from Anythingforums, old topic ID:1606, old post ID:21234
Thats last one is good.