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I have to be the dumbest computer person ever. Just reading some of these posts, I'm confused by what's even being said! I need to ask a question, but not knowing anything about all this, I'm not sure where the proper forum to ask is. So forgive me if I'm out of place.

I got an email today from my ex, saying she didn't approve of my online activities. How in the world she could know of my online activities I have no idea! She doesn't even know where I live now, much less have access to my computer! How could she possibly know what websites I visit, what emails I send, etc, etc, without having access to my computer? I understand from what I googled that you can track an ISP, and I have sent her emails from my primary email address. Is she possibly tracking my ISP to see what my online activity is? I'm so confused, and worried what she could do with this information. Although I am over 18, and I'm doing nothing illegal, it could still be embarassing (and detrimental) for me if this info got out.

Any help is appreciated, and your understanding and patience with me is welcomed!

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37564

Did she have access to the computer at any point in time? Like did she live with you before? Also if you don't already, buy a NAT router to protect you from any possible open ports that you don't know about. typicaly they're just plug and play but read the instructions to find out how to secure it more. So you'll plug in like:


[Modem]=====[router]======[pc]


Modem would be your cable/dsl modem.



Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37566

reply yes she can be tracking you. she could have hired an Privet Eye that knows
the way of the internet spying.
and given him your email address.

thus giving him the place to install spyware, in which case they already know
that you came here looking for help. if they did not block this site then you should
do what red said to do get a router. but also get a firewall that is a protection program that keeps PI's from getting in. its called a firewall cause it works like
the firewalls in the house that stop the fire from going to each room if the house is on fire.

so get one of those programs they arefree look at http://www.majorgeeks.com

there were some new ones in the last week just posted there.

also look for any other free anti spy ware program like adaware and get them make sure you get the full program and not just their update file.

get a trojan remover, get a antivirus program. and use them all to make sure
you find what ever they put on your computer to allow them to track you.

also did you have a messy divorce? or split up? maybe she did nothing but send you that email just to mess with your head.??

how smart is she with computers smarter then you?

if so take that computer off line, turn it off take it out of the house and to a repare
shop. not one she knows about or went too take it to a different town if you have too.

let them scan the system to see if there is in fact anything on it that they are using to watch your online surfing. if your doing things you should not do? then erase the files you got and all the other stuff like saved web pages of sites you should not be at. before you take it to the shop other wise they will see you been bad.

and then never do that bad stuff again. see what trouble it can cause you in way of worrys?


Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37567

Why don't you get a free email address that you can use when you email her?

Although, I don't know why anyone would want to email their ex, anyway.

But, when you sign up for this email account, don't put in any info when you sign up.

If they ask for your name, just put your initials or a fake name.

Hotmail is free.

I think she's messing with you & I'd tell her to STFU.

If ANYONE has access to your PC except you, set up a password for it--maybe there's a spy in your house.

Go HERE-click and do the online scan

You must use Internet Explorer, not Firefox.

It works great & will allow you to remove any bad things it finds on your PC.

When she said that she didn't approve of your online activities, didn't you ask her how she would know what those activities might be?

I know I sure would have.

Then I would have told her to F*** OFF

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37568

Zone alarm(firewall): http://www.download.com/3000-2092-10039884.html
AVG anti-virus: http://free.grisoft.com/doc/avg-anti-virus...e/lng/us/tpl/v5
Spyware remover: http://www.spybot.info/en/download/index.html
Adware remover: http://www.lavasoft.de/products/ad-aware_se_personal.php
Firefox (a more secure internet browser): http://www.mozilla.com/en-US/firefox/

These are all free programs that they are talking about and for any words your don't understand look them up at http://www.webopedia.com/

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37570

No, this person has NEVER had access to my computer. As I said, she doesn't even know where I live!!. This is a new computer since we split, so there's no chance that anyone has been in it to install anything to track my whereabouts.

This isn't the case, but it's an example of what's happened. We broke up, I moved away and continued on with my life. I'm visiting websites looking for a new relationship, and then suddenly I get an email from my ex (after no contact for 4 months) saying something along the lines of "not approving of my online activities. Not to mention the HotHookUp personals site I've been checking out." Sooooooo, it's obvious my ex knows what sites I've been to, because one particular site was mentioned by name. I havent put any personal information on these sites, haven't registered my email or name, so I can't figure out how it would be known that I've been there at all!!

I am going to follow thru with all the suggestions, and the links that have been provided to me. Thank you all very much!

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37572

Miss409 wrote: I'm visiting websites looking for a new relationship, and then suddenly I get an email from my ex (after no contact for 4 months) saying something along the lines of "not approving of my online activities. Not to mention the HotHookUp personals site I've been checking out."  Sooooooo, it's obvious my ex knows what sites I've been to, because one particular site was mentioned by name.

OK--I don't know how she could have done this without professional help.

I think she NEEDS professional help.

I'm fairly computer savvy & I can't do it.

Especially if you're not registered on these sites.

I think you have a spy in your house that's feeding her info or a mutual friend who you're telling stuff to.






Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37574

if i wanted to i could find you in a matter of 7 weeks or less.

and i don't even know your real name.

example i drove semi truck and before that i used the cb radio in my car.

i was working a part time security job. one night a guy a big base station radio
which is just a huge house radio like a hamradio you see in all them old movies.

but he got to bragging that nobody could ever find him since he was using a smaller then treetop level antenna tower. and he was always messing with people. he found me at work on my cb radio in the car one night and bet me he
could not be found not even by a security guard.?

he caught me at the end of my shift. i did not tell him i was going home.
i just started hunting him.

i found him in less then half an hour. never heard from him again.

no more bragging no more insults nothing.

now you that know radio are thinking i had an array of atennas. and just dialed him in.

wrong i had one whip antenna.
i just zero'ed in on him by turning the squelch up to where i heard nothing and then drove in a 3 mile circle of where i had an idea of where he was, and kept making a smaller circle until i heard him again. then tuned him out and did it again.
only took about 20 minutes to find him.

so see if she wanted to she could find you in notime at all. but she would find you faster by getting a Priv Eye. which if you had a messy time of getting away from her she just might have hired a priv eye. and they don't need to be near your computer to install spyware on it.

as i said she would have giving them your email.


thats all they need to put something on your system if your system is unprotected.





Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37575

try using proxies too it will make it harder for them to track your site visitations.
Here's a site with some proxy server ips plug that into your IE (internet explorer) or Firefox and

Deffinition for a proxy: http://webopedia.com/TERM/p/proxy_server.html
Proxy server list: http://www.samair.ru/proxy/
How to set up a proxy on IE: http://www.library.kent.edu/page/13821
How to set up a proxy on Firefox (note you have to scroll down a bit for the instructions) : http://www.astahost.com/info.php/how-set-u...efox_t8621.html



Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37578

Ok, so I read the replies again. My next question is, I checked out the proxy links, and it said that AOL, MSN, and Yahoo already have several proxy servers with their services. I have one of those services already as my main internet service provider. Do I still need another proxy if my internet provider already offers them? I'm soooooooooooo confused.



Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37579

actually proxies won't do much, they'll just track the queries and still know where you're going, unless you find a https proxy. A proxy is better in a situation where you want to hide your IP or bypass a site's ban.

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37580

the best thing is the router. and firewall and antispyware combination group of software programs.

unless you want to get offline all together then that is the best thing.

get that router and other software.
the get your system scanned for any thing like trojans or worms or backdoors.

they are all basicly the same things but have a little different coding.
all will get in or let a hacker in to your system.

and once in they can take control of your computer and you won't even know they are there, unless your able to tell by how much memory or power is being used.
but normal users won't know.

so get that antivirus program and scan your system then find an online system scan for free and scan your system from online i think some one said pcpanda is good? i used trend micro but they had something messed up the last ime i used that one.

but do all you can for free to secure you system. with the scanners.

and then unplug your computer from online and shut it down take it to the other town repair shop and let them scan it with their bigger scanning systems.
make sure nothing is on your system they can use to see what you do.
then keep your security software UPDATED that is most important to do.
because there are groups of hackers that just sit there all day and night making things to mess up your system.
it is even a class in one college some place in europe but they say they don't put the code in that actives the worms so it is not wrong?
but they do post their codes for others to read and then rotten apples that read them put the code to working order and send it out to everyone in emails just to cause trouble.

so you can not be online today with out having security software and keeping it updated. i spend about one hour a day checking all my secruity programs for updates and maybe longer if one is in need of a huge update.

first thing every day i do at logon is check for antivirus updates.

what i am saying is that thanks to hackers and other rotton apples everyone is now forced to do maintance on their computers or have a full time IT department to do it for them.

just abotu 80% of the computers in the world are not secured and they are the ones that keep getting infected with programs made by hackers.
and they are also the machines that keep spreading the hackers programs because of not being a secure computer it can not stop the virus or worm when it is run on the system.

just about 60% of the computers that are secured with software are out dated because nobody ever updated the security software.
and those computers are also infected with virus's that the old software does not know about.

there are even internet servers that have virus's sitting on them and when you go to that website on that server you get attacked by the virus if your not secured you end up getting that virus on your system
and become a proud sponser of the hackers software.

so you see you need your system secured and cleaned out. if she did hire a Priv. eye then they used any one of the ways hackers use to get in your system.

and if you get all your system secure and find nothing in your system.
then you know she is just messing with your head.

or its just like richardj said and you have a friend that is also still her friend and they are telling her your information.

but you cant tell until you get your system secured and cleaned out.



Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37581

There is an anoynomizer program called Tor that I was going to talk about, but it gets a little complicated.

Then I found a new Firefox with Tor built into it.

It will be slower, but you can use it just for those 'certain' sites.

New Version of Top Anonymous Surfing Program
TorPark is a special portable version of Firefox that incorporates the free Tor anonymizing service that allows you to surf anonymously by relaying your connection through a chain of special Tor servers. It created quite a sensation when it was released last year as it provided users with an easy way to surf anonymously without going through the hassle of configuring complex network settings. It could also be run from a USB flash drive which made it ideal for use on public terminals. A new version has just been released based on Firefox V2.0.0.2 rather than V1.5 used in the original. Additionally, a new optional pay service has been introduced that allows much faster surfing, one of the known drawbacks of the Tor service. Freeware, Windows 98 and later, 11.0MB
http://www.torrify.com/software_torpark.html

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37584

1)why not just try to find yourself on the internet and clean up?
since you were with her she probly knows you better then most of your firends and hence already has the tool needed to find you ... that tool is basic information about you

example would be type your personal information into google and other popular search engines and see what comes up (nothing to personal like NO creditcard info) but little things like your first and last name or your screen name('s) your email address etc etc anything you have or may have given away on the internet can be found by these sites alot of the time

any real info you use on this site and any other site like dateing profiles can and may show on google ... would you be in california by any chance? no? then are you somewhere in france? these are 2 locations i get just by screen name miss409 also leads me to ages and some other personal info about miss409 tho i dont know enuff about you to say its you

i bet i could find you in a matter of minuts or hours just by chatting with you on msn to get to know you lol the only thing slowing me down would be how long it took to get information out of you
some basic information and a search engine is all thats needed to find someone on the net and in somecases can find there home and phone# using the net

2) change all your passwords especally email as you email leads to ALL sites you use and can save sent and recieved copys
for one a hotmail or any other email account is easy enuff to get the password for if you know the person well enuff and again im sure since you were with her she probly knows you better then most of your firends ... also dont forget to change the secret question if that is available and dont use an answer that anyone can guess ... remember 8 in length with at least 1 number and 1 capital is a strong password

example:my best friends favorite car is a toyota supra?
his secrest question for email is "what is my favorite car?"
geez that would be hard to get into huh? knowing that his fav car is a supra i could get in with less then 5 trys at guesing how he spelled it
"toyota supra" "supra" "Toyota Supra" "Supra" "SUPRA" if basic car name didnt work i could use the cars street name as in "7MGTE" "Mk4" etc untill i had it right ... knowing my friends car could get me into his email understand? but if he used say suPr4765 i would not be able to get that as the numbers have no meaning to him and knowing him will not help me figger out where the cap should be places and what random numbers were used

the people who know you best can find you easy online and can get into your stuff with ease

3)this is the last option and probly unlikely but has she sent you a program or any odd pictures anything via email or over aim msn etc ... send you something that has an odd extention? if so then just a virus and ad-ware scan should find that along with changing passwords as that probly what it gave away

as for the rest of you guys lol come on you really think that some of the stuff you mentioned is going to help? yes a firewall router and proxy will help keep people out of your computer but that still does not stop the user from leaving a trail ....think basics guys cuz not alot of people know how to make a virus or connect to an open port on a computer and track other users using 1337 tech skills so like be realistic guys ....
no i dont think she went to higher a privite eye to find you on the net
a fire wall and virus protecton should be there always but if not it does not mean thay are smart enuff to make a virus or connect to you to get info

ps: sorry for the crappy spelling etc but it 6 am and i have not had sleep

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:4746, old post ID:37585