Canada apology to US

Red Squirrel · Post by **Red Squirrel** » Sat Jul 03, 2004 2:43 pm

On behalf of Canadians everywhere, I'd like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry.

I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron, but it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all, it's not like you actually elected him.

I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper and better than your own. It would be like if, well, say you have 10 times the television audience we did and you flood our market with great shows, cheaper than we could produce. I know you would never do that.

I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defense I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours. As a way of our apology, please accept all of our Canadian NHL teams, which one by one are going out of business and moving to your fine country.

I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up against a crazed dictator, you want to have your friends by your side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different: Everyone knew he had weapons.

I'm sorry we burnt down your White-House during the war of 1812. I see you've rebuilt it! It's very nice.

I'm sorry for Alen Thick, Shania Twain, Celen Dion, Lover Boy, the song from Sherif that ends with the high pitched end note, your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer, but we feel your pain.

And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way, which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this, because, we've seen what you do to countries with whom you get upset with. For 22 Minutes, I'm Anthony St.Joseph, I'm Canadian. And I'm sorry.

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kaz · Post by **kaz** » Sun Sep 19, 2004 12:17 pm

Isnt Bryan Adams also canadian? I think he is, but im not sure, but if he is the world demands an apology for that. im kinda drunk i think btw.

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sweetness · Post by **sweetness** » Sun Sep 19, 2004 1:19 pm

Red Squirrel wrote: On behalf of Canadians everywhere, I'd like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry.

I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron, but it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all, it's not like you actually elected him.

I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper and better than your own. It would be like if, well, say you have 10 times the television audience we did and you flood our market with great shows, cheaper than we could produce. I know you would never do that.

I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defense I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours. As a way of our apology, please accept all of our Canadian NHL teams, which one by one are going out of business and moving to your fine country.

I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up against a crazed dictator, you want to have your friends by your side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different: Everyone knew he had weapons.

I'm sorry we burnt down your White-House during the war of 1812. I see you've rebuilt it! It's very nice.

I'm sorry for Alen Thick, Shania Twain, Celen Dion, Lover Boy, the song from Sherif that ends with the high pitched end note, your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer, but we feel your pain.

And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way, which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this, because, we've seen what you do to countries with whom you get upset with. For 22 Minutes, I'm Anthony St.Joseph, I'm Canadian. And I'm sorry.

i love the canadians

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MrSelf · Post by **MrSelf** » Sun Sep 19, 2004 4:07 pm

I love how Canadians will find anything to bitch at Americans for while using everything they can get their hands on from America.

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OLKMED · Post by **OLKMED** » Sun Sep 19, 2004 4:13 pm

Red Squirrel wrote:
I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron, but it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all, it's not like you actually elected him.

Well put

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shenbaw · Post by **shenbaw** » Mon Sep 20, 2004 12:47 pm

Red Squirrel wrote: I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this, because, we've seen what you do to countries with whom you get upset with.

Times have changed,
Our kids are getting worse
They won't obey their parents,
They just want to fart and curse. Should we blame the government, or blame society, or should we blame the images on tv No!
Blame Canada! Blame Canada

With all their beady little eyes,
their flapping heads so full of lies
Blame Canada!
Blame Canada!
We need to form a full assault, it's Canada's fault! Don't blame me, for my son Stan, He saw the darn cartoon, and now he's off to
join the klan! And my boy eric once, had my picture on his shelf, but now when I see him, he tells me to

myself

Well, Blame Canada!

It seems that everything's gone wrong since
Canada came along
Blame Canada!
Blame Canada! They're not even a real country anyway. My son could of been a doctor or a lawyer, it's a true, Instead he burned up like a piggie on a barbecue Should we blame the matches? Should we blame the fire, or the doctor who allowed him to expire. Heck no!
Blame Canada!
Blame Canada!
With all their hockey hubaloo and that bitch Anne Murray too. Blame Canada!
Shame on Canada!

The smut we must stop
The trash we must smash
Laughter and fun
must all be undone
We must blame them and cause a fuss
Before somebody thinks of blaming us!

Archived topic from Anythingforums, old topic ID:379, old post ID:12410

Red Squirrel · Post by **Red Squirrel** » Mon Sep 20, 2004 2:14 pm

Of course, blame Canada, we are the quiet ones and look suspicious, especially with our cheap lumber and or lack of debts.

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ShadowFlood · Post by **ShadowFlood** » Mon Apr 24, 2006 9:56 am

were sorry you have a naval fleet of 2 subs.
and the south park movie pwns canada

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Sammyboy15 · Post by **Sammyboy15** » Thu May 04, 2006 7:42 am

canada has some huge army underground somewhere and eventually they will take over the world

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Roger Waters · Post by **Roger Waters** » Fri May 05, 2006 4:03 pm

We thank canadians for Pamela Anderson

thats about it though

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ycontrol · Post by **ycontrol** » Sat May 06, 2006 3:26 pm

America should appreciate Canada because we were always there for them...when they were in the right that is....also when Russia and China decide they've had enough of America (it's gonna happen)...America will need us to help them and we will be there for them again.

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Clueless · Post by **Clueless** » Sat May 06, 2006 9:48 pm

psh, we dont need canada! we're americans!! lol

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Roger Waters · Post by **Roger Waters** » Mon May 08, 2006 10:14 am

ycontrol wrote: America should appreciate Canada because we were always there for them...when they were in the right that is....also when Russia and China decide they've had enough of America (it's gonna happen)...America will need us to help them and we will be there for them again.

with what? maple syrup
plus America is helping russsia the immeninet conflicts will be with north korea iran and maybe china

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Clueless · Post by **Clueless** » Mon May 08, 2006 4:37 pm

i like maple syrup

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Roger Waters · Post by **Roger Waters** » Wed May 10, 2006 9:12 am

especially on waffles

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Clueless · Post by **Clueless** » Wed May 10, 2006 4:33 pm

no, pancakes

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Roger Waters · Post by **Roger Waters** » Thu May 11, 2006 9:53 am

no, on bacon

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Clueless · Post by **Clueless** » Thu May 11, 2006 4:46 pm

no, on scrambled eggs!!! (actually thats really good, you should try it)

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Sammyboy15 · Post by **Sammyboy15** » Fri May 12, 2006 7:49 am

if ham is canandian bacon then wat the hell do u call bacon

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Roger Waters · Post by **Roger Waters** » Fri May 12, 2006 10:21 am

Clueless wrote: no, on scrambled eggs!!! (actually thats really good, you should try it)

I have it is actually good

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Roger Waters · Post by **Roger Waters** » Fri May 12, 2006 10:21 am

Sammyboy15 wrote: if ham is canandian bacon then wat the hell do u call bacon

they call it ham

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Clueless · Post by **Clueless** » Fri May 12, 2006 4:18 pm

Sammyboy15 wrote: if ham is canandian bacon then wat the hell do u call bacon

canadian ham

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robonightmare · Post by **robonightmare** » Tue Feb 27, 2007 12:26 am

shenbaw wrote:
Red Squirrel wrote: I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this, because, we've seen what you do to countries with whom you get upset with.
Times have changed,
Our kids are getting worse
They won't obey their parents,
They just want to fart and curse. Should we blame the government, or blame society, or should we blame the images on tv No!
Blame Canada! Blame Canada

With all their beady little eyes,
their flapping heads so full of lies
Blame Canada!
Blame Canada!
We need to form a full assault, it's Canada's fault! Don't blame me, for my son Stan, He saw the darn cartoon, and now he's off to
join the klan! And my boy eric once, had my picture on his shelf, but now when I see him, he tells me to myself

Well, Blame Canada!

It seems that everything's gone wrong since
Canada came along
Blame Canada!
Blame Canada! They're not even a real country anyway. My son could of been a doctor or a lawyer, it's a true, Instead he burned up like a piggie on a barbecue Should we blame the matches? Should we blame the fire, or the doctor who allowed him to expire. Heck no!
Blame Canada!
Blame Canada!
With all their hockey hubaloo and that bitch Anne Murray too. Blame Canada!
Shame on Canada!

The smut we must stop
The trash we must smash
Laughter and fun
must all be undone
We must blame them and cause a fuss
Before somebody thinks of blaming us!

amen. (not really) but thank you south park!

Archived topic from Anythingforums, old topic ID:379, old post ID:57445

scherzo · Post by **scherzo** » Tue Feb 27, 2007 4:13 am

Sammyboy15 wrote: if ham is canandian bacon then wat the hell do u call bacon

bacon is bacon

back bacon is Canadian bacon

I think

As a Canadian, I will apologize for my previous thoughts on Americans, I have definatley been proved wrong in the following video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJuNgBkloFE

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Stasi · Post by **Stasi** » Tue Feb 27, 2007 4:51 am

Hardy har har, how many cuts and edits did they have to do to make it look like everyone they asked was absolutely clueless? And we never see these sorts of things done elsewhere. Really, these sorts of jokes are tiring.

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