shower tutorial

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Red Squirrel
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shower tutorial

Post by Red Squirrel »

How To Shower Like a Woman:

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper

according to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do

more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long

loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced

with real passionfruit.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mold spots with Tilex.

Get out of shower and stand on bathmat.

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. smile.gif

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How To Shower Like a Man:

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.

Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. Pee.

Rinse off and get out of shower. Avoid bathmat.

Dry off forearms and butt only.

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.

Admire wiener size in mirror again. Shake it to watch water fly off.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the

'woo- woo' sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:3328, old post ID:26983
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Pyr-O-Rgasm
Posts: 954
Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 5:16 pm

shower tutorial

Post by Pyr-O-Rgasm »

Yes. Another fuckin' hilarious post by Red! :lol:

Woo-woo!

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:3328, old post ID:26985
Fuzzy_Fox
Posts: 174
Joined: Tue Sep 14, 2004 9:31 am

shower tutorial

Post by Fuzzy_Fox »

Pyr-O-Rgasm wrote: Woo-woo!
Bad visual! Bad visual! :cry:

Archived topic from Iceteks, old topic ID:3328, old post ID:26995
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